Wednesday, December 19, 2007

NOW That’s What I Call Party Hits!
CD review by Muchacha Motorista

Everybody on the dance floor! Muchacha Motorista is about to spin a fresh, new review for y'all! So party like a rock star and put yo' weight on it!

NOW That’s What I Call Party Hits! is “20 chart-topping hits” that can be broken into two, clearly defined groups. There’s one group of songs with lame lyrics but hot beats, and one group of songs with lame lyrics and horrible music too. There is not one song on this album that I can honestly say has good lyrics, no matter if you define “good lyrics” as meaningful lyrics, intelligent lyrics, or even just plan witty lyrics.

I mean, I just can’t say that I get a tear in my eye when Mims sings: “I’m hot coz I’m fly/ You ain’t coz you’re not/ This is why/ This is why/ This is why I’m hot.” And I am not drawn to ponder the deeper meaning of Kelis’: “My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard/ And they’re like/ It's better than yours/ Damn right it's better than yours/ I can teach you/ But I have to charge.” These two songs just bring the album down, way down, as do such gems as the lyrical stupidity of “Right Thurr” (Chingy) or Amerie’s “1 Thing” in which the music sounds more like experimental crap with no rhythm to be found or danced to.

Okay, now that I’ve gotten that out of my system, I can say that I do know this is an album of PARTY HITS. These aren’t supposed to be songs that make you feel connected to your fellow man, or called to a higher purpose. These are just the songs you hope the DJ pulls out at the company Christmas party in lieu of “Celebration,” “YMCA,” or “Love Shack.” Songs you can really just dance to and have a good time despite being surrounded by your colleagues. That’s why I’d say that if you haven’t download the individual songs on iTunes yet, some of these might be worth the album.

Shop Boyz’ “Party Like A Rock Star” starts the album off well, if you can ignore the lyrics (“t-t-totally dude/ party like a rock/ party like a rockstar/ party like a rock/ party like a rockstar”). And even though it is somewhat degrading, if you turn a deaf ear to the lyrics, Kanye West’s “Gold Digger” is pretty fun too. Sexist in the other direction is Pussycat Dolls’ “Don't Cha,” which is the exact kind of song to which a dozen girls will tell their dates “hold my purse!” and rush out to the floor to dance like a stripper and mouth the lyrics. An annoyingly self-important song, but a proven party hit in clubs all over the country.

There are even a few real killer songs on the album, and I mean that without any sarcasm. “Do It To It” by Cherish featuring Sean Paul and Youngbloodz has a slightly slower cadence that encourages more carefully planned dance moves without the need to flop around just to keep up. Sean Paul’s “We Be Burnin'” has such an intentional beat that it plays as perfect on the dance floor as it does on an iPod’s workout playlist.

It isn’t all brand new songs on here, though. Kylie Minogue’s repetitive-but-catchy (and aptly named) “Can't Get You Out Of My Head” is a throwback to 2001, and what party album would be complete without the overplayed-but-still-awesome “Hey Ya!” by Outkast?

I can recommend this album if you haven’t already bought most of the good songs. But please be brave, and do the right thing by skipping over “Milkshake.” No one wants to hear that crap.


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